We live in an age where we have access to the inside of other's lives at our fingertips. We have to remember that this is just a 'snap shot' and not the full picture. We all have different family dynamics and structure. As parents, we are all doing our very best to raise healthy and happy children.
You've been up all night with your baby who is unwell at the moment, you haven't washed your hair in 4 days and your top has vomit on it. You have finally got your baby down for a nap and your 2 year old is happy watching cartoons, so you decide to sit down for a much deserved and needed coffee and maybe that chocolate you've been hiding from everyone for a moment just like this. You decide to have a look at Instagram, Pinterest or Facebook and just like that... BOOM!!! The comparison game has begun. You see the fit mum who has taken her 5 children out for a morning hike and writes something like 'getting fit and healthy, no technology for our family.' You glance over at your toddler who is glued to the TV and you instantly feel like a bad mum. Then you see another mum all glammed up in her spotless house with her children looking so perfect and playing together nicely, with the caption 'just baked some vegan organic blueberry muffins for my little loves.' Once again you look at your house which looks like a bomb has gone off and your toddler is eating a pack of chips. How do you feel?
Then there are the playgroups. I remember going to a park playdate and I had packed some crackers, not organic and in a pack! I know the horror! I remember one of the mums had everything fresh and cut up in containers and I felt so much pressure. I didn't take into account that I had a toddler and a newborn, I just looked at her and thought she was a better mum because of the food she had prepared for her children. Don't get me wrong, I love to cook and have always cooked fresh and healthy food for my family, but in this certain situation, I didn't consider all the healthy meals and snacks I have cooked for them, I judged my parenting based on comparing myself to what this mum had brought to the park for her children compared to the snack I prepared for my children. For a while after this, I put so much pressure on myself to pack the 'perfect' lunchbox for the park, which my kids rarely ate because they were too busy having fun and playing.
Parenting is not easy but nothing worth doing is. Let's enjoy the journey and be kind to ourselves. The working mum, who is the first to drop off her kids to kindy and the last one to pick them up, you are doing an amazing job providing for your family. To the stay at home mum, who is still in her pyjamas at noon because she has had a clingy baby all day and hasn't even been able to go to the bathroom let alone care about what she looks like, you are doing an amazing job caring for your baby and being their safe place. To the mum who takes her 5 children out for a morning hike, well done and you should share that with the World and that mama who has seen your post while her toddler is glued to the T.V you are doing an amazing job! Your toddler is happy and enjoy this little break guilt free, because your baby might wake up in about 5 minutes. Mums, Moms, Dads out their stop this comparison game that is robbing you of this moments joy.
I have had to learn to stop comparing myself to other mums, because it was either making me feel bad about myself as a mum or I was judging other mums who weren't doing as much as I was, which is just so horrible. We need to stop judging ourselves and others and instead start supporting and celebrating each other. I have found that since becoming a mompreneur / mumpreneur and starting our kids watches business, I have had to learn how to work without feeling guilty. I have also had to stop comparing my business progress with other mompreneur / mumpreneurs that are hugely successful and remember that this is my journey and to celebrate other mums / moms as well as myself. This is still a journey for me and I would love to hear your thought and feelings on this topic.
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